Another rant to pour out.

Why am I still crying for the same reason? Why does it hurt still? Who to be blame with what happened? Is it my fault? How did it happen? Have I already moved on?

Frankly speaking, my heart can’t answer any of those questions, neither do my mind. I tried believing in myself that everything has already been accepted, and forgotten. I have been pretending the whole time that I’m happy. In fact, I tried because I have to. I have felt the most pain actually, because I loved the most. No one can tell, and no one can prove that I’ve been through a lot. Even I, don’t know who to call for help whenever I need shoulders to cry on, whenever I need to speak out when my heart starts to explode, and when I need companies to find those solutions in my mind. I thought our Superior, God, can help me surpass this burden, I thought He is enough to make it go away but every time I need Him He was just listening because He wants me to learn and to be strong. So, aside from God, only I, understands myself. I am the solution; I am the right answer to overcome this pain.

It’s me who is not yet ready; it is me who doesn’t know how to start moving on from the past. It is me who doesn’t want to. Why? It is because I really don’t know. Maybe I’m afraid, or maybe I still love him so much. I’m not sure what I want, or I still don’t know the right answer to say it.

I found myself lying on a comfy bed, dreaming of a guy who could actually love me more than he love himself and protects me more than my guardian angel do. But, I had woken up with the thought that a guy like that would probably don’t exist, and if he is, I don’t know if he’ll meet me. Someday, a better man will come over, not just on a dream, but in reality. 

She excludes the fact that a person can love her more than she loves herself. She let her pride go up and never return on being the person she was before. What she kept in her is the respect and contentment of what she is right now. She thought she could handle everything without needing any help from anyone. She believes in herself that she’s the weakest. Moreover, she could not resist having those thoughts in her mind, because she’s the one who let it in to herself. She is as novel as a book. She is as wise as an owl. She is strong. She is more than what she thinks to herself, but she never tried believing it again.

giotriestoblog:

You are the reason why I write and why I cannot write. You see, your entirety can ruin me. You plant the trees for my words but you also uproot them in the most random seasons. Sometimes, my tongue and my hand get all messed up with all the unnecessary jibberish. All because of love. All because of you. I hate them, these seasons. But I love you anyway.

(Source: ninthsea, via valenciagio)

The Liebster Award helps us smaller bloggers gain recognition and some more followers in this crazy world! The rules for the award are:
1. Link back to the person who nominated you.
No matter this rule isn’t considered, I still thank you for nominating me. You really make me happy.
2. Post 11 random facts about yourself.
Well,

I cry when I laugh.
I love soft drinks.
I don’t know how to cook.
I miss my ex.
I’m falling in love for someone again.
I eagerly want android gadgets.
I’m crazy and immature.
I usually need silence and aloneness.
I’m into vintage and abstract.
I’m starting to love my course.
I’m back to blogging!

3.  Answer the 11 questions that person gave to you.
Your top 5 favorite songs.

I won’t give up – Jason Mraz
Butterflies fly away – Miley Cyrus
Scared to death – KZ Tandingan
Little Things – One Direction
To the moon and back – Savage Garden
Describe your worst experience.

Painful and Unforgettable.
Tell something about your nickname you have and how you got it.
I have lots of nicknames, but what I like the most is “AINE” which my friends named it before me to combine for our group name. Then when they began calling me with that name, they loved it. So I let it be my nickname when I was in high school.
Talking or listening?
I’d rather choose listening than talking because I’m really not into talking. I’m an introverted person.
Do you believe love is a choice?
For me, it is. Because love isn’t expected, it is a responsibility that we have to share and we have felt. Love can also be a choice, because loving someone is a great sacrifice. So, love’s description depends on you.
What are your reasons to be happy?
My Family, God, friends, enemy, and you :)
Ghost you would like to meet?
Hmm. Ghost stands for? Can I choose my Grandparents and my Ex?
Have you fall out of love?
Yes, I did, and I believe that I will still be in the future.
Books or movies?
Books, because I can turn back the page where I wasn’t sure I understood the part. Books are better too because the thrill is more exciting, while in movies it lessens.
Why do you love tumblr?
Because the bloggers are so approachable and kind.  I also love this site because I encounter real-life stories and I learn so much on here.
You’re all time favorite movie.
A walk to remember
4. Nominate (tag) other bloggers that you think deserves recognition.
Everyone deserves this award, anyway. I’m going to nominate the bloggers that I want to know better. 
Thatha, Ly, Charmaigne, Caryl and Dona
 5.  Make up 11 questions for them to answer.
Whom are you in love with?
Are you happy? 
How are you doing lately?
What’s your summer plan?
If there’s one gift you want to have, what is it? Why?
What sports are you into?
How do you show your love for someone?
Why is blogging means so much to you?
How well do you appreciate your life?
Beauty or Brain.
Comment/s from my questions.

The Liebster Award helps us smaller bloggers gain recognition and some more followers in this crazy world! The rules for the award are:

1. Link back to the person who nominated you.

No matter this rule isn’t considered, I still thank you for nominating me. You really make me happy.

2. Post 11 random facts about yourself.

Well,

  • I cry when I laugh.
  • I love soft drinks.
  • I don’t know how to cook.
  • I miss my ex.
  • I’m falling in love for someone again.
  • I eagerly want android gadgets.
  • I’m crazy and immature.
  • I usually need silence and aloneness.
  • I’m into vintage and abstract.
  • I’m starting to love my course.
  • I’m back to blogging!

3.  Answer the 11 questions that person gave to you.

Your top 5 favorite songs.

  • I won’t give up – Jason Mraz
  • Butterflies fly away – Miley Cyrus
  • Scared to death – KZ Tandingan
  • Little Things – One Direction
  • To the moon and back – Savage Garden

Describe your worst experience.

  • Painful and Unforgettable.

Tell something about your nickname you have and how you got it.

  • I have lots of nicknames, but what I like the most is “AINE” which my friends named it before me to combine for our group name. Then when they began calling me with that name, they loved it. So I let it be my nickname when I was in high school.

Talking or listening?

  • I’d rather choose listening than talking because I’m really not into talking. I’m an introverted person.

Do you believe love is a choice?

  • For me, it is. Because love isn’t expected, it is a responsibility that we have to share and we have felt. Love can also be a choice, because loving someone is a great sacrifice. So, love’s description depends on you.

What are your reasons to be happy?

  • My Family, God, friends, enemy, and you :)

Ghost you would like to meet?

  • Hmm. Ghost stands for? Can I choose my Grandparents and my Ex?

Have you fall out of love?

  • Yes, I did, and I believe that I will still be in the future.

Books or movies?

  • Books, because I can turn back the page where I wasn’t sure I understood the part. Books are better too because the thrill is more exciting, while in movies it lessens.

Why do you love tumblr?

  • Because the bloggers are so approachable and kind.  I also love this site because I encounter real-life stories and I learn so much on here.

You’re all time favorite movie.

  • A walk to remember

4. Nominate (tag) other bloggers that you think deserves recognition.

Everyone deserves this award, anyway. I’m going to nominate the bloggers that I want to know better. 

 5.  Make up 11 questions for them to answer.

  1. Whom are you in love with?
  2. Are you happy? 
  3. How are you doing lately?
  4. What’s your summer plan?
  5. If there’s one gift you want to have, what is it? Why?
  6. What sports are you into?
  7. How do you show your love for someone?
  8. Why is blogging means so much to you?
  9. How well do you appreciate your life?
  10. Beauty or Brain.
  11. Comment/s from my questions.